Tuesday, November 08, 2005
86ed
So Gerard is no longer allowed to patronize the bar. Turns out that on Sunday night, after he had gotten sloppy drunk and the bartender refused to serve him anymore, he threw a fit. Flustered, she called the bar-owner, Dave, who happened to be across the street. He came over and tried to handle the situation diplomatically, offering to hail and pay for Gerard's cab home, but Gerard was having none of it: "Who the hell are YOU to tell me to leave?! No one knows you here! I know everyone in this Goddamn place! I'm here every day! Who the hell do you think you are?!" he roared.
After calmly informing Gerard that the bar was his, Gerard slapped him in the face. So Dave punched him, and then they proceeded to take it into the street, where they went on to beat the shit out of each other. This is funny for about ninety different reasons, the first being the visual of Dave in his Oklahoma baseball jacket and round, prominent beer gut throwing punches at slender, pale jeans-wearing, sixty-five-year old Gerard, the second being Gerard fighting back. So Gerard is now 86-ed from the bar. They both escaped relatively unscathed; no one had to go the the hospital.
When I heard the news yesterday, it reminded me of the fact I, too, am 86-ed from an East Village establishment. A couple of months ago, I went to Sidewalk cafe with Annie and Melissa, and ordered a chicken quesadilla. I asked the waitress if I could have it without the chicken, if they could make it just with the cheese that it already came with, and she said it was fine. It was fine--until the bill came and I learned that they had charged me two extra dollars to REMOVE the chicken from the quesadilla. To make a long story short, I refused to pay extra for the chicken extraction, got into a screaming fight with the waitress and then the manager, and am now 86-ed from the restaurant with the most delicious salad dressing in all of New York.
On another note, I got a job at Law and Order today. I'm gonna miss bartending. Book-publisher Jenny came into the bar last week, eager to meet some guy she was having an affair with. When he stood her up, she decided to just get drunk at the bar by herself, and ended up stumbling out the door mumbling, "And to think--I shaved my asshole for that asshole."
These are the moments I will miss.
After calmly informing Gerard that the bar was his, Gerard slapped him in the face. So Dave punched him, and then they proceeded to take it into the street, where they went on to beat the shit out of each other. This is funny for about ninety different reasons, the first being the visual of Dave in his Oklahoma baseball jacket and round, prominent beer gut throwing punches at slender, pale jeans-wearing, sixty-five-year old Gerard, the second being Gerard fighting back. So Gerard is now 86-ed from the bar. They both escaped relatively unscathed; no one had to go the the hospital.
When I heard the news yesterday, it reminded me of the fact I, too, am 86-ed from an East Village establishment. A couple of months ago, I went to Sidewalk cafe with Annie and Melissa, and ordered a chicken quesadilla. I asked the waitress if I could have it without the chicken, if they could make it just with the cheese that it already came with, and she said it was fine. It was fine--until the bill came and I learned that they had charged me two extra dollars to REMOVE the chicken from the quesadilla. To make a long story short, I refused to pay extra for the chicken extraction, got into a screaming fight with the waitress and then the manager, and am now 86-ed from the restaurant with the most delicious salad dressing in all of New York.
On another note, I got a job at Law and Order today. I'm gonna miss bartending. Book-publisher Jenny came into the bar last week, eager to meet some guy she was having an affair with. When he stood her up, she decided to just get drunk at the bar by herself, and ended up stumbling out the door mumbling, "And to think--I shaved my asshole for that asshole."
These are the moments I will miss.
# posted by Katie @ 5:18 PM 
